All together, of what I have lived through, more than thirty years I have spent sick or with some kind of chronic pain. This has certainly given me a particular insight into illness, health and also the human mind.
I remember that weekend when I stayed with my friends and started limping because of an intense hip pain. I remember perfectly well that morning, seven months of medical pilgrimages later, when I was diagnosed. I had turned 16 years old, the doctor was looking at his papers and my parents, but his eyes barely crossed mine. I anticipated a lifetime of pain and progressive disability over the years. And I remember perfectly well my anger content (at that time I was very angry) and that first thought that came to mind: if somewhere in the world there was a solution, I would find it! Although the pain and illness were known to me, from then on my situation changed drastically, it wasn't going to be solved with one more hospital admission, not in a couple of weeks, not in a couple of months, not in a couple of years. My adolescence was broken, sick and later rejected by a broken family. And there began a path of searching, self-exploration and learning.
When I was 22 years old I finished my studies, they hired me immediately and I started my professional career as a programmer and developer of management software. I started out in a small IT company, which however was in really big projects. This forced me to learn very quickly, although I was good at it. But the star of fate was not to have the best practices of my promotion and instantly get a programmer job, that was just the packaging. One of the company's owners knew a doctor in my city who was doing "alternative" techniques. This doctor became one of the most important people in my life. In 1992 I started therapy with him and decided that after many attempts this was going to be my big bet, I had very good feelings. He did not promise me any results, in an act of true sincerity. It was the beginning of a therapeutic process that lasted eight years, in which I learned to take on my illness. While I was still learning other natural techniques, attending different seminars and reading a lot (I am a great self-taught person).
In 1995 I started my career in another of my most important journeys, reiki. I also studied acupuncture for the first time (I did it again at a different school in 2000). At the same time, the company where I worked went bankrupt, one of the partners took the money and I was left without receiving more than a year's back pay, which caused a series of problems that, to cut short, resulted in my mother throwing me out of her house, so I opened the 25 years at a friend's house who took me in. And there I was, exiled, sick, handicapped (could walk, but with great difficulty) and unemployed. I was wondering how is so much bad luck possible? I finished my reiki training and started practicing auto-sessions daily. In 1996 I started giving reiki seminars and sessions, completely abandoning my short and intense career as a software programmer.
Between 1997 and 2000 I continued to do the seminars that I found interesting and could afford. I met a teacher and dedicated a lot of time to meditation, which I had been practicing in different ways since I was 14 years old, because since I was a child I was very curious about consciousness and the meaning of life. My economic situation was quite precarious, but the little money I saved after paying the basics to survive was spent on attending intensive courses and courses in which I continued to incorporate healing tools. At one point he also gave me time to travel the world attending events related to the meditation master I followed. I learned a lot in those years, it was very interesting to get to know the world (the first time I left Spain I went to Australia!). I slowly continued to mature. In 1998 the symptoms of my illnesses diminished for the first time and my left foot was able to rest completely on the ground again, 12 years later, although I still had quite a few problems. That same year it can be said that I was already carrying out a multitude of experiments and developing new techniques to perceive and manage the subtle energy fields, opening up my facet of a researcher completely. It can be said that in the year 2000, from a clinical point of view, I surpassed the two chronic and "incurable" diseases I went through. This was the result of a sustained attempt for 15 years and a work of healing, self-healing, growth and inner self-improvement in which I basically reinvented myself. I was finally able to stop taking medication and going to the hospital. I've hardly been to a doctor in the last 15 years. However, I still have some after-effects; I live with pain in my musculature on a day-to-day basis and I still have to take care of myself exceptionally so that my body doesn't get sick. It's hard for me to exercise normally and I get tired more than usual.
I am aware that I have done something very difficult, but all I can say is that it is not the same difficult as it is impossible. At one point I came to understand the difference between healing and healing. The healing we have been taught consists of eliminating symptoms or illness, dissociating them from who we are, what we feel or how we live. Healing seeks a final goal, sometimes at any price. I think it is a good thing that this approach exists. Doctors should take care of the healing. Who knows me well knows that I am a great admirer of the medicine of our time and that much of what I know is thanks to it, the pity is that we are so far from the meeting point between the two visions. Healing is a process in which the important thing is to compensate for the loss of health with learning, experience and awareness. The most important thing in healing is the journey. It is like the warrior's way, you do what you have to do, with uncompromising intent and impeccability without expecting results, without complaining and with audacity. Whoever understands this already understands a lot.
So here I am, with more than two decades of experience and the feeling that I've just started because there's a long way to go. I have developed the Bioenergetic Resonance, Resonance Recapitulation, Emoenergetics, I have remodeled Reiki, I have written a book and I am going for the second one. I like to think that part of my professional and vital path is to introduce a variable in the fixity of people's lives, an alternative reference point that can enrich their choices. Thanks to everyone.